US: Intercambio des Poissons Estadounidenses

This is the US version of this swap , that all would-be travellers may join! Please see several relevant clicky-links on the international swap page, and read password in comments if you wish to join US-only swap!

It is spring at Teddington Locks and it is time for the Lock-Keepers to celebrate its arrival with the Fish-Slapping Dance.

For those of you unfamiliar with this ancient ritual, it is said that it is a very silly dance.

So that it may be replicated, this swap has been created. This is a polite version, in which the fish are NOT sent naked, but FULLY CLOTHED and in an envelope. An IMPOLITE version will soon be created at The exclusive spot for silly people on Swap-Bot, so you will want to AVOID THAT for certain if you are offended by NAKED TROUT WEARING A BRA, for example.

Two smallish, FULLY clothed fish ("deux petits poissons," or, alternatively, "dos pescados pequenos") will be manufactured, created, located and transferred, or otherwise FACSIMILATED, sent in an envelope to your partner, please, with a brief wish for a bounteous boat lock season (or, "une saison eclusiere tres joyeuse" or "una temporada eclusera muy abundante"), and a travel itenerary that your fish might choose were they millionaire fishes with passports. Perfectly OK for them to stay in the US, but we don't want to squelch their irrational dreams about travel. It is perfectly legal for fish to be flat., and made out of paper, and sent in a regular envelope. 49 cents will do, and the tax man will not come after your fish.

Recipient will then RATE your fish on 1) SMELL, or lack thereof, 2) SILLINESS, and slap a nearby creature lightly on the cheek. Slapping oneself on the cheek is frowned upon as it indicates a tendency to insanity. Perhaps swap participation of any sort also suggests this tendency, in which case, YOU MAY WANT TO AVOID THIS SWAP.

Participants will be thoroughly vetted by our accountants and anyone lacking sufficient funds to cover lawsuits brought by random passers-by will be rejected, or offered a 1:1 swap. Have great ratings, if you are new have a great profile, have great fun, and yes, I do angel all my swaps.